Deviating from college football

I have a legitimate concern: Are we sure that Tommy Lasorda is actually still alive? Or were they merely filming "Weekend at Tommy's"?

Because Waterboy rules

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umlFRUE6zoY

Throwing a T-bone to my viewing audience

Because let's face it: I'm the only female of the species who visits this site. So here's my gift to you, courtesy of my (and your) friend Jody:

http://tebows.com/

Yep.

What's old is new again

This is the same violation mentioned a few posts below. But I am posting Deadspin's take on it because I'm the one (the ONLY one in the nation, surely) who sent them the tip. So, I am officially a freelance sports reporter, folks. You're lucky you know me. That, or I'm a total loser who needs a hobby until September rolls around, take your pick.

http://deadspin.com/5228563/someone-take-away-lane-kiffins-phone

Fun with Lane and technology

This really just speaks for itself:

http://www.tiderinsider.com/mb/msg/6536585.html#6536585

I suppose I shouldn't be laughing so hard and that I need to grow up, right? Well, we all knew that, anyway.

Spring practice fun

So, we went to today's scrimmage, which was pretty much what you expect--not too much action (although a couple of nice td passes, one from each qb, and some on-the-spot field goals). Meaning that we were left to devise our own fun.

One of the best games? Taking stock of two rather, er, noticeable players and then trying to figure out who they were when we got back to a computer. No. 3 was distinctive (besides his junior dreds, my absolute least favorite hair trend for players) because I looked at him and immediately said, "I swear, I'm as tall as he is." It was certainly entertaining watching him go up against a 6-foot-plus player in drills. No. 44 also stood out because I think if you look up "sparkplug" in Webster's, it'd show him--he was almost as wide as he was tall (which again, wasn't very, but he didn't look quite as Lilliputian as No. 3).

So I logged on to Hokiesports.com and saw, sure enough, that they're not in the numbered roster. Thus began the hunt. For No. 3, I scanned heights... a couple of 5'9"s, so no... and then, yes: he really is 5'6". My exact height. CB Justin Sinclair. Think I can take him?

No. 44 proved equally as easy--scanned the 5'9"s and 5'10"s, then looked at the weights... and yup: 5'9", 245 lbs. LB (duh) Tim Richardson.

And if THIS little venture--much less that I'm bothering POSTING about it--doesn't prove that I'm desperate for college football action, nothing ever will.

Finally, a note of sadness: ESPN is not televising today's Orange and Blue Game. Sigh. I know the rest of you are relieved to be spared the Tim Tebow show. Enjoy it while it lasts.*


* For the record, I don't approve of the Tebow media saturation. The last thing in the world that I want is for us to become the next Notre Dame. Bleagh.

I'm going to need a calculator to add these up...

Seriously, is there really anyone willing to defend him as being crazy like a fox instead of just crazy stupid?

http://www.thestate.com/breaking/story/752547.html

Like deer in headlights

Just as I am lamenting that someone must have put duct tape over Kiffin's mouth, thus giving me nothing to work with, I stumble across this photo.



Honestly, it's delightful. I love that they coordinated their shirts to represent, that there seems to be absolutely nothing going on behind either set of eyes, and that they both appear to be mouth-breathers. Awesome.

Caption this, if you dare.

It does pay to be stupid

According to reports, this is the Kiffins' new residence. Not bad. I have to assume that Layla--who is a Florida grad and, much to my delight, owns a photo of Tim Tebow, according to none other than Lane--picked it out.

http://www.realtyexecutivesknoxville.com/index.cfm/Home-Search-56.html?event=listingDetail&ListingID=284568

(And yes, it really is a slow news time around here.)

Shamelessly borrowed post

New football definitions from Every Day Should Be Saturday:

http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2009/04/08/neologisms-2009-edition/#more-9873

Two of my favorites:

Stinespringensumpfenheit: The unique state of being stuck in the morass of an offense coordinated by Virginia Tech OC Brian Stinespring.

Meyerplexy: A continuous neuromuscular spasm resulting in uncontrollable rigid pointing of the index finger and arm for hours at a stretch.

odds and ends

You might notice a few odd things about my sites for the next few weeks. Such as that someone named "Chris" is entering the posts. Long story short (is there ever such a thing?), my blogger account is being used for my graduate class project on product placements in blogs. I've created six dummy blogs for testing purposes, and these will be live for the undergrads. Should be interesting. Also, I will be (even more) absent during this time, due to work and school commitments. Meanwhile, I'm about ready to be committed.

See you around...

How 'bout them Vols!

Just because I can

I present to you Andre Smith, ladies and germs. Formerly of Bama, soon to be... somewhere?